the unbearable lightness
It's been a while since I've been able to write an earnest entry without distractions. This is probably why I can never live in California or any other sunny place: I can't seem to write unless the room's dark and everyone else is asleep. A kind of Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde thing. In the daylight, I'm stuffing my feet into 80% off shoes and wondering how to better contour my eyes. Then now, I'm completely collapsed within myself and grappling with how to better express myself. Ah, the duende.I haven't been to church in almost a decade (and this was from going every week since I was little), yet I find myself growing more and more spiritual every day. I'm determined to finish reading the Bible and also to find a church that I feel comfortable going to. I don't know why this change is occuring--I just know that it is. I wouldn't say I've lived a very Christian lifestyle, but over the last year, I've cleaned up quite a bit. I've never done drugs (not even weed), quit smoking, and haven't been drunk since Halloween. Part of me wonders if the lifestyle changes are spiritually based, or if I'm just getting older.
But to tell you the truth, Christianity scares me. Maybe not the religion, but definitely the people. Yesterday, I surfed through some televangelism shows, and I couldn't help holding back laughter. The sermon was just so dumbed down so that the average American could understand it, and it was simplified to the point that it became unbelievable. Then I watched a Catholic mass with all of the chanting and kissing and making symbols, and I don't buy that either.
One thing I've always wondered is this: exactly how educated is the average pastor or priest in America? Would an atheist English major understand the Bible than someone raised Christian? I don't want to start a debate or anything; it's just something I think about, and perhaps why I don't really trust churches and spiritual leaders. I don't really plan on getting baptized either, though that may well change in the future.
So, that's all I'm going to say about religion.
It may seem like I'm only trying to lighten the mood, but I'm being completely serious. I've found a new love: DSW. You can find such great deals there, and you don't even need to ask some bitchy salesclerk for your size. I've finally broken my curse with shoe-buying and am starting to appreciate what other women around the world have already discovered. Shoes can be cute without being expensive.
I really wish I could get started on my essay. The topics are just so way over my head, and the last thing I want to do is analyze Spenser to death. Fortunately, essay-writing's gotten a lot easier after being forced to write paper after paper without so much as a week's break. AND....I still have my students' papers to revise and quizzes to make and homework to assign.
OBJECTIVE: LOSE 5 POUNDS FOR SWIMSUIT TRYING-ON SEASON
APPARATUS: A KIND YET STERN INDIVIDUAL TO DRAG MY FAT ASS TO THE GYM
PROCEDURE: WILL AWARD $10 FOR SUCCESSFUL ATTEMPT
DIFFICULTY LEVEL: BITES AND KICKS
posted by Tiffany @ 11:56 PM
2 Comments:
yeah i feel like if i started sleeping normal hours, my blogging would decrease 95%. at least the emo factor.
also i go to the gym like 3-4 times a week. i can drag you if you want.
FATASS. u r never gonna go to the gym
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