snow white vs. stepmother: who's it better to be?
With the birth of teenage classics such as "Clueless" and the more recent "Mean Girls," has the storytale moral message been changed from one of virtue and endurance to one of survival? Does Darwin truly rule over teenage society?As a teen on the verge of 20's-dom, I've seen and participated in a fair amount of battles: weak vs. strong, passive vs. bitchy, passive-aggressive vs. all out hair-pulling. But who truly wins in the end? It's been said that nice guys finish last--but this I can understand. In evolutionary terms, the more aggressive, jerky guys simply send out signals of testosterone: "Pick me! I have the strength and energy to protect your young from harm! Don't choose him! He's too nice! He'll just cower in the corner when the tigers come!"
From a more personal perspective, I picked someone so annoyingly self-assured that I hated him for a good part of my life. After all, I couldn't help but bench all the "nice guys" in my life simply because I thought they wouldn't perform as well in the game. Karl was more than a surprise though; instead of maintaining the narcissistic attitude I'd associated with him since forever, he proved that he kept a store of affection reserved for one person, and one person only. A true Beauty and the Beast story.
So if nice guys get benched, do nice girls finish last as well? Let's turn to my parents for a while:
Dad: If you ever get into a fight, don't lose. Don't walk away, either.
Mom: Someone you don't like? Here! I have a suggestion: (insert well-concocted evil plan here)...oh. but you should really try to be nicer. Oh! I have another idea!
In my family, it's all about survival of the fittest. Manipulation is simply a weapon that needs to be ground sharp every once in a while. For that matter, I always found a victim whenever my sword needed to be sharpened. There are 3 key elements in helping you get what you want: confidence, brains, and beauty. If you're missing one of the three elements, don't even try. Of course, the definition of brains and beauty aren't what you may think. If you're confident enough to believe you're the hottest piece of ass around, eventually you'll convince others too. As for brains, there's a difference between intelligence and wisdom (Mom pg.415). It doesn't matter whether or not you can spout mathematical equations on cue if you can't manage to say exactly what someone needs to hear.
My favorite Disney character of all time (ever since I was a little girl!) has been the stepmother from "Snow White." Now this is a woman to be admired. She knew exactly what she wanted and wasn't afraid to get it. She knew that Snow White would go for the pretty laces; she knew that she would buy a poisoned comb; she knew that she would be enough of a fatass to go for a poisoned apple. In our day, she'd rule supreme. It was only a stroke of bad luck that landed her into the jaws of (insert horny prince/wolves/etc depending on edition). See, I don't blame the queen at all for what she tried to do to Snow White: that bitch was obviously on her turf and there's only enough room for one pretty face in the kingdom.
posted by Tiffany @ 1:02 PM
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